I can’t remember the last time a man picked me up for a date and came up to my house to ring the bell. It possibly never happened at all. Usually there’s a phone call, a text or they sit outside and honk the car horn over and over again. Always a nice way to begin a date. Maybe I should take a step back and partially blame technology. Before, there were no cell phones or beepers. Unless you had a girls house number you were required to ring the bell and quite possible go through the awkward stages of meetings someones parents or siblings.
This is where a watch came in handy. It was something to distract you, something you could look down to in between half smiles and sips of unsweetened ice tea. Now men get a break from that and maybe we’ve made things too easy for them. This cycle trickles down. When men went out of their way to ring your bell, they were able to walk outside with you and open the car door. Now all they do is sit there and tell you to come outside. They flip a switch and you’re left to open your own door and before you can say Hi the car jerks forward down the street and your scurrying to put your seatbelt on. Or that weird moment where the seatbelt doesn’t come out. You later find out it’s because it’s synced to the breaks. I found that out myself. Thank you BMW. You get to the restaurant and open the car door yourself and pray you don’t stumble on a crack in the sidewalk in your heels. At least men still open establishment doors for women, there’s a glimpse of hope left for the modern day man. You order and he pays. The glimpse becomes a glimmer. Some men have the audacity to go dutch. I’ll give my middle finger to that one. If it’s a casual hang out then cool but if it’s a date, you sure as hell better be paying for my meal. I might be a modern woman but I still believe in old fashion ways. I want to be wooed. I want romance. I want you to try. Impress me.
Oh yeah that scenario was for the guy with a car. Now a days, with high gas prices, we take the train or a bus everywhere. Thank you MTA for raising the fares once again. You meet Mr.Right or possibly Mr.Wrong at the destination and then the above scenario continues, well unless he’s already inside the restaurant…then you’re on your own with the door. I’m just tired of people saying chivalry is dead. It’s only dead if you let it. It’s dead if you don’t put your foot down and demand it. Some of these men need a reminder course. People say women are complicated. We’re not! Okay, maybe we are but we’re worth it and if you want a good woman then you need to make an effort. I’m a hopeless romantic. I want the fairytale. I don’t want to be the 1 in 2 people getting a divorce. Is the idea of a soul mate dead. I’ll be honest with you. I don’t believe that there’s one person for everyone. I believe there are many, possibly hundreds of potential soul mates. The factors all depend on timing, age, geographic location and exposure. If you stay in New York all your life. Guess what. You’re meeting a man in NY. I travel all the time and I meet a plethora of men. Maybe the man of my dreams is on the carnival cruise ship or a school teacher in France. Maybe hes a chef in Italy or a doctor in Amsterdam. If you stay in your bubble then chances are, though you’re dealing with tons of men, that the pickings are slim. Get out there. Have an eat, pray, love adventure and release your inner Julia Roberts. Learn Italian, make love in Paris, smoke weed in Amsterdam, and ride a donkey in Greece. Maybe, the modern day man your looking for is thousands of miles away, on another continent, over vast seas.
But what do you think? What happened to ringing the bell, opening the car door, giving her your jacket? What happened to romance?